Archive for June, 2011

Enough said.

Posted: June 29, 2011 in Uncategorized

Pastor Niemoeller, a victim of the Nazi Holocaust got it right when he stated: “First they came for the Jews and I did not speak out – because I was not a Jew; then they came for the communist and I did not speak out – because I was not a communist; then they came for the trade unionist and I did not speak out- because I was not a trade unionist; then they came for me – and there was no one left to speak for me.




Posted: June 29, 2011 in Uncategorized

Denham Country Park (C)2011 Paul Clevett


My leg is quite swollen and I have to have injections into my stomach every day, my stomach is now pretty bruised from all the injections. Work have not paid me on time which means I’m fast running out of money, I’ve got pretty bad hay fever, my car tax is nearly up…

So my confession is.

Psalm 23
 1 The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
4 Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,[a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever. (NIV)

When some Christian’s think of us Gay people they think to love us could be compromising  their faith.

Perhaps not to love us is to compromise their faith.

Belonging to a church that demonstrates the unconditional “take me as I am” kind of love creates in someone like me a real desire to follow Christ. Being welcomed unconditionally, even if I were to find a partner, means I can come, with out one plea to Christ, knowing these people, this church of God will not judge me because I am weak and find it difficult to survive on my own.

I’m experiencing a new kind of church, a church where the old pews meet with a lively exciting new kind of worship, not happy clappy but deeply reverent but yet allowing a boy dressed as a cowboy to take part in communion from the pulpit steps, allowing us all, young and old to be who we are, even in the solomn surroundings of altars, candles and stained glass windows.

None of the marble splendour of history counts when it comes to Christ, only community in him. The bride of Christ, after all, is not a stone wall, stained glass window or unfriendly alter, the Bride of Christ, is a bunch of folk in love with him, its BBQ’s, swimming pools, abandoned worship, hope, faith, love, sacrifice, enacted in his people.

I have not been in this church long, my last church was awesome don’t get me wrong, but I think I had too much history, it was that church I was outed in, that church I separated from my wife in. Now it’s time for her and me to get healed up. Someone in my last church said I did irreparable damage to her, but then I pointed out that the teachings of the church at that time had done that, I had purely acted on what I was told, that I could choose to be straight. I’m not excusing myself from living a lie, that was wrong. I caused a lot of pain and I have to live with that.

You see what church should do is cause wandering children to reach out for Christ, wandering children like me, I have been a prodigal in church for too long, I’ve been afraid of what others think of me, in essence fear of the people in church made me live a half life, trying to do everything I could to be accepted but never feeling accepted, because of one small thing in my life that I or anyone else seemed unable to change. Even God himself did not seem willing to fix the problem despite the incredible pain it caused.

So well done St John’s at last I can be myself and I like it.

From a forum…

Posted: June 24, 2011 in Uncategorized
This is a passage from a forum where someone called Iggy asked me a question…


If you could speak to all Christians, from lay person through to pastors, priests, elders, bishops, etc., what would you want to say to them? What would you want them to hear?

My Reply

Well that’s a brilliant question.

I think a few things.

Firstly I’d ask that if you are straight you come along side us and understand that we have the same struggles with the Bible over this issue you do. Except for us as LGBT people it really matters what the outcome is as it affects our lives. If you are straight, your theology on this matter does not affect you directly, apart, perhaps from making you find it difficult to deal with us. If you decide we have to be celibate, then we have to live with that and being alone is hard. For some of us almost unbearable.

We ask to be loved and accepted without judgement into churches AS WE ARE, just like you are accepted. For example, it’s really difficult when you attend a church where they are fine with you until you get into a relationship then things get difficult, it’s a kind of conditional love.

Most of all, I ask church leaders and christians to talk with us. I am really happy to go and talk to anyone even if they really struggle with these issues, in an open an honest discussion. I think that both the LGBT community and the church need to talk. I have done talks for mens group on how it feels to be a gay person who is a Christian. A lot of them are shocked.

You see, this is not about a few verses from the bible. it’s about peoples lives and how Jesus can reach us. For some reason he does, for some reason people like me fall madly in love with his power, his strength, his ability to heal and save and mainly Jesus himself. He reaches across all the prejudice and hate towards us. Even though I’ve been through hell. I’m still standing in Him.


Sunday at a new church

Posted: June 24, 2011 in Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

I have found the most wonderful, accepting, non-judgemental church.

Went on Sunday with my two kids who had a great time. My youngest was pretty worried she’d not found a new friend yet after 1/2 hour, but that was soon rectified and she was holding hands with a little girl called Millie.

I’m in the band already which is great. They all know I’m gay. I was really upfront about it.

There is a lovely lady there who asked people questions like “are you gay?” she asked someone who said no, and I looked up, “Oh”, she said, “I’ve offended someone”, “no”, I replied, “I’m gay”, she nearly died of shock, the vicar burst into fits of laughter followed by most of the small congregation. I don’t think she ever expected anyone to say yes! We’ve become great friends!

Upon returning home we asked the kids which church they wanted to go to, my oldest said “Oh St John’s, because they really care about Daddy”. Says it all doesn’t’ it.

That’s how powerful unconditional acceptance is.


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