What is marriage?

Posted: March 21, 2012 in LGBT Issues

Continuing my impromptu series on marriage, I have been thinking more about it.

Marriage, in fact, is a celebration of something that has already happened. When someone wants to get married, surely all they are doing is confirming that they want to spend the rest of their life with another person. They make a public declaration of their love for another person, formally, and then a commitment for life, in front of witnesses.

Before Marriage was invented, I suggest people  would just move in together, just commit to each other, perhaps we don’t really need the government, the church, or anyone else to give us permission to marry and to live together forever, in a committed and loving relationship. For, where possible, life.

Marriage, really, in reality, lets face it, is not some kind of “Holy thing”, there are many marriages that are, in fact, completely unholy, horrible, abusive, Marriage is not Holy. Holy means, set apart for God, it’s not set apart for God, it was created for man, it’s not a sacrament, nowhere in the Bible is it ever seen to be. It’s a structure, a desire, an agreement and when it goes wrong, it’s replaced by another desire and agreement and sometimes a lot of pain.

Perhaps some people are scared of gay marriage, because they worry we will do a better job, better flowers, tasteful design, arty music and beautiful love. Marriage you see, even if there is “gay marriage”, won’t be gay, it will just be a confirmation of what has already happened. After all, we don’t have a “Gay lunch”, my food doesn’t become gay because I eat it, or my car gay because I drive it, it’s just food, it’s just a car.

What is certain to me, is that LGBT people are no less precious to God than straight people, and, in fact, LGBT  people like straight people sometimes need structures to help them function in healthy relationships.  Not to regulate our relationships and tie us up, but to provide security and commitment for both partners.


  1. Alan Bainbridge says:

    Hi Paul just read your piece on marriage, excellent another piece of good reading & common sense I agree with it wholely.
    Also i read your piece about all the dating sites and had a good laugh (not at you) but i have had similar things happen to me on them. A lot of foreign people have hooked up to me, one in Africa even said he was my cousin, however he wasn’t, but one of my grandmothers brothers emigrated to Africa many years ago and I know I have relatives there, but I have no idea how this guy knew that, any way he was after money, so he went the journey, and I must say they aren’t backward in coming foreward if you know what I mean, they are in love with you as soon as they see your pic then the next message is wanting money, they must think we are all daft here!! Any way hope you are well, will chat again soon, keep in touch. Alan.

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