Archive for May, 2012



Real Christians.

Posted: May 25, 2012 in Uncategorized

I don’t need to say anything about this. Just read the site.

I’m sure Jesus is proud.

The cross.

Posted: May 23, 2012 in Christian Ethics

Dear Lord,
I thought i’d talk to you about this cross I have to carry,
It seems as if I’m the only one who is carrying such a wooden, rusty nailed, mess of a cross,
Everyone else’s crosses, Lord, are padded and some of them, like those lovely worship leaders and pastors, seem to have bright flashy lights,
Oh and the rock throwing,
IT seems not only do I have to carry this uncomfortable cross, but people, with the best intentions keep throwing rocks at me,
And whats more using the Bible to back up their actions.
How am I supposed to defend myself with just this cross?
Hang on, just looking at it, it looks like it’s second hand!!!!
Second hand!!!
Oh, there are nail marks in it and there seems to be, what is it?
Oh this just gets worse.
Exactly who’s blood? oh? it’s yours?
The other crosses are fakes? really?
But they look so real?
You died on this didn’t you?
You died on it for me?
Maybe I’ll just keep this one Lord,
No, really,
This one is fine,
In fact, in a strange way, now it seems kind of beautiful,
At the end of things,
This is the only one that matters.

Luke 9:23

23 Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.” (NIV)

It seems to me the whole anti-gay thing is becoming more “anti” than ever before. This man who is supposed to be a shepherd of a flock, a fisher of men, is nothing more than a “Christian Hitler”, who wants to set up concentration camps for LGBT people.

It is no wonder, when you read the comments of this article that LGBT get the message that this is what all Christians think. Which it simply isn’t.

Please if you read this and you are LGBT don’t think that God hates you, or Jesus doesn’t love you and wants you behind a fence.

I hope that if you are a Christian in a state of confusion over the whole LGBT thing, you won’t do what this guy did, and just spew out hate towards us. But, perhaps you will talk to us and discover that we hurt from these people.

I hope he never visits Belgium or France, men are always kissing men over there, even the straight ones!

Anyway, I’m not a  hater, so if he wants to come for lunch he’s very welcome. (and I promise not to kiss him, I’m gay, not blind).

You know when you go somewhere and someone says something that just hits you right between the eyes.

Well I feel like I have had a whole morning of it at church, especially in our discussions over lunch. See, I’ve been trying to find a partner. With really not much success and not without investing in some memberships of gay dating sites.

Anyway, I’m a bit of a Moses type. I kind of try to do everything myself…and generally mess it up. I find it difficult to trust God with one or two areas of my life and one of these is relationships. Probably because when I think about a relationship with a partner I just think of pain.

So I’ve decided now to trust God for a partner who will be a blessing to me and my kids and my ex-wife too, and someone I can be a real blessing to. Until them I have to just trust God and that for me as a gay man is very hard. So I prayed about it and now I do feel at peace and ok that if God wants me to be alone…I will have him… and if he the best for me is to be with someone, then that’s fantastic.

It’s a mystery. Help me Lord.


“Good luck to you. Love who you would like to. I do not need every five minutes to hear you banging drums and blowing trumpets there are much more important issues in our community, families, and the world than this”

This post on our Church Facebook group by someone who just can’t handle the whole Gay Marriage thing (and Gay people in particular I shouldn’t wonder).

I have been thinking about it, mainly thinking about drums. Drums are like hiccups. Just when you think there is silence they start up again. I guess that people standing up for those who cannot stand up for themselves, or fighting for injustice, can, sometimes be like a really annoying beating drum. If you listen long enough something is going to happen. You either learn to ignore the noise, you try and stop it, or you take action on the message of the music.

Music, noise, drums sometimes carries with it a message. If the message isn’t being heard, perhaps we need a bigger drum. Or a different instrument with which to carry the message. But one thing is for sure. I am now more and more determined to bang a drum louder than ever for us to be heard. You see, LGBT rights is not about us being agreed with. That will never happen. But recognising, that in spite of our differences we can live our lives in the way that we should and want to, in the way that God intended us to. Not living the life other people want us to have.

Perhaps I should try cymbals?


Well folks, I didn’t sleep much last night and I woke up early so I thought I’d put pen to paper (well fingers to keyboard).

As you all know, for a while the children and I have been attending a wonderful church. I have many friends, who, despite me being gay love and accept me, not in a “love the sinner hate the sin” way, but actually in a way that has contributed I think to a lot of inner healing from the past.

But recently some things have come along that made me think that perhaps things were not as rosy as I thought.

“The Gay Marriage Meeting”, there was a meeting in the Lady Chapel about gay marriage, which, frankly I did not go to, the reason was a woman behind me started going on about gay people and how we wanted everything.

The iBelieve magazine, that was given out free with an advertisement by a group that didn’t want gay marriage and in fact the advertisement is under scrutiny from the Advertising Standards Authority as it is misleading, it uses statistics that are from the Catholic church and not a cross section of the population (there is an article about it in this blog).

Then our church set up a facebook page! It was all going brilliantly. Until this…


The banner was not posted by me . But some one else in the church.

    • Me I love it – and LGBT people will know exactly what it means because of the rainbow colours, we have rainbow colours in our main stained glass window
      A membera good sign to make us all feel welcome and at home – I shall look for the rainbow of hope

    • Another Member Do we really need to know this why cannot you be a human being like the rest please stop labbeling yourse4lf and just be a quiet human being for once,!

      Me I shall now be a quiet human being you won’t see me again. (at this point frankly I felt like leaving the church)
    • Another Member I think the point is that some human beings don’t feel accepted as human beings if they are upfront about who they are. Keep working on it pls folks. Human beans or jelly beans, we need each other with all our weird flavours. (Maybe these are Harry Potter’s Every Flavour Beans? The next one might be earwax flavour but God loves ’em all..)
    • Another Member its all about love for one another whatever – i think our fb group is a space to explore that concept

      Another Member Good luck to you. Love who you would like to. I do not need every five minutes to hear you banging drums and blowing trumpets there are much more important issues in our community, families, and the world than this.

      Me I’m really saddened by what you’ve said. You have no idea the impact that this kind of homophobia has on people. If you don’t want me or others like me at St Johns, my kids and I will find somewhere else.
      This is a terribly important issue. The church over the years has terribly wronged LGBT people. Every year LGBT people commit suicide because of bullying a lot of them are quite young, teenagers and some of that has come from so called Christians. This is an important topic. As important as families and community. As a gay person I will, I’m afraid be banging on about it.
Ok – so after that I just wrote to the vicar and said, really, I don’t think I should carry on coming to St Johns, it was clear this person is not only struggling with the issue she’s trying to push it neatly under the carpet and I wonder who else has issues with this.
Oh and I’m entirely nervous about posting this on the blog. Only because I’m not sure it’s appropriate. I mean, if I say nothing, just go along with all this, then for those who are not out and who are questioning their sexuality, church will never be a safe place.
Please please don’t think that my church is anti-gay. Actually this is just one person, but Hitler was just one person.
Has anyone got a drum I can bang?